Newsie Events :
A popular media personalty, and writer, Betty Irabor, has advised people against giving so much into a relationship and expecting a favorable outcome in it.
She made this known through her Twitter page whilst narrating an encounter she had with a young lady during a counselling session with her
The young lady was so bittered that after 18 months of doing everything for her man in a relationship, ‘sacrificing her all’, the man later dumped her. She felt used and dumped.
Advising people after the young lady’s experience, Ms Irabor stated that every relationship is a potential risk without any guarantee that it will lead to marriage, not minding if there’s ring already on the finger or not.
The publisher and founder of the popular, Genevieve magazine, pointed out that ‘sacrificing in a relationship, whether it is for the boyfriend, girlfriend, lover or husband should be voluntary, a choice the person made by himself or herself without any expectation of reciprocity.
She also noted that there are no ‘sacrifices’ that can force or change the decision of a man or a woman who is not ready to be with you .
Read her full post below;
“Was having a “Counselling” session with a young lady the other day and she wouldn’t stop talking about how her ex of 18 months used and dumped her after all she sacrificed for him.
While this is very unfortunate, i would like to say that every relationship is a risk and there are no guarantee that most will lead to marriage even when he has put a ring on it.
Sacrificing for your boyfriend, girlfriend , lover or husband should be a choice or decision you make without expecting to be rewarded for it. it should be voluntary.
Many people expect these ‘sacrifices’ to influence favorable emotions, loyalty, commitment but we all know how some of these have played out. Many mothers gave up their dreams for their ‘intended’ those days.
Took on extra jobs to give their partners opportunities, good education and still ended up with nothing.
My take on this is: If you are making all those your “sacrifices’ to force a reciprocity of your affection with the intent to take your relationship to the next level,
you may be setting yourself up for a heartbreak and these types of unhappy endings ….
Those ‘Sacrifices’, your money, your time, your affection and playing wife will be nothing but (SAARA), (which means an act of generosity in Yoruba language).
Overcompensating to make a relationship work is mentally draining.
It takes two to have a healthy relationship. If you are the only one doing the giving and adjusting to fit in into your partner’s schedule then you are in a relationship all by yourself.”
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